Old Boys Song – Chicago

Here are the lyrics to the short version (believe me!)…

………………………………………………………
Chorus:
I used to work in Chicago,
In an old department store,
I used to work in Chicago,
I don’t work there any more.

………………………………………………………

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some meat.
Some meat she wanted, PORKED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for glazed doughnuts
Glazed doughnut she wanted. CREAM FILLED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for brass taps
Brass taps she wanted, GOLDEN SHOWER she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for Beefeater Gin
Beefeater Gin she wanted, EAT HER I did
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for quick service
Quick service she wanted, quickly SERVICED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for ground coffee
Ground coffee she wanted, GRIND HER I did
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a jumper
Jumper she wanted, JUMP HER I did
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some liquor
Liquor she wanted, LICK HER I did
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for an elevator
Elevator she wanted, MY SHAFT she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a carpet
Carpet she wanted, DEEP SHAG she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a hammer
Hammer she wanted, NAILED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a gun
Gun she wanted, BANGED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a watering can
Watering can she wanted, HOSED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a floppy disk
Floppy disk she wanted, HARD DRIVE she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some velvet
Velvet she wanted, FELT she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some bolts
Bolts she wanted, MY NUTS she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some sailors
Sailors she wanted, SEMEN she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some ham
Ham she wanted, PORKED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some cigarettes
Cigarettes she wanted, MY PIPE she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a plumber
Plumber she wanted, PIPES CLEANED she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some butter
Butter she wanted, SPREAD she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for some seafood
Seafood she wanted, CRABS she got
Chorus

A woman came into the store one day, asking for a nail
Nail she wanted, SCREW she got
Chorus